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  1. Re-Opening Closed Wounds


    #385902012-09-10 21:56:56 *PushPinn said:

    I've been pretty upset lately. Not depressed, just...upset and hurt.

    I was in a relationship that I truly was happy with. But... I guess the guy didn't. He dumped me. Well after crying my eyes out he took me back. I was so happy. I was willing to change so much about my self. We were laughing, horsing around like we used to...cuddling and every thing... Then..a week later on my birthday weekend...he dumps me... again. I guess it hurt a bit more seeing as I thought we were both happy and that I still had not fully recovered from the first breakup.

    I mean if I looked back 4 days from today, we were so happy. We were playing in the rain, cuddling, holding one anther...and then...just the other day I got dumped. It hurts pretty bad. He told me he took me back because he acted out of the heat of the moment with emotions. I can't believe I took him back... but he was the only person who made me feel protected. I never get held or told I love you and my previous boyfriend was mentally abusive, ask Darci. :c

    I guess I'm just sour and bitter about everything... He told me that our relationship was the happiest he ever had...so why did he end it? He told me family problems. That was the first reason he dumped me. I know about his family... I was trying with all my might to have him lean on me. I told him he could cry on my shoulder, he could vent to me...But he never did. He never took my hand when I reached out to help him... Maybe I wasn't strong enough...maybe he didn't see me as someone to keep and I was dead weight to him. Who knows.

    But he's never been on the receiving end of a breakup. He doesn't know what it's like to love someone and then have that person turn around and just leave you... I wonder if I have even crossed his mind even for a moment...I wonder if he even misses us. He told me, the night that he took me back after hugging me and crying, that the world can't be that bad if he had me. I was in love with him. I thought he loved me too... He sure acted like he did but I guess not..

    He told me he would hold me in the fall..we'd cuddle in a pile of leaves...and that we'd build an igloo together... I was looking forward to all the promises he made... and he didn't keep any of them... Not one... Not even the promise that he made me about my birthday weekend. He told me he would take me out on a picnic and we would spend the day together. But instead he broke up with me on the promised day. Best birthday present ever. Didn't help that not even my own family remembered so I spent this birthday alone with a tear burned face. Lovely.

    We both agreed to going back to being best friends like we were before all this. But what I'm scared of is that nothing will be 100 percent the same.

    I'm also thinking about that when his family matters are settled...he'll find someone new...and they will be happy forever...unlike us because our relationship was just bad timing in his life. He wont take me back a 3rd time...

    I just feel...a bit dead on the inside and a little numb to everything.

    I just think I might have been dead weight to him...

    Why did he take me back..? Why did I say yes..? Why do I still even care about him...? It hurts a lot...

    /rant/venting

    Feel free to share what's been bothering you personally on here as well so I don't look like the only whiny bitch.

  2. #386152012-09-11 05:28:09kitcat6541 said:

    I know how you feel I had something very similar happen it doesn't get much worse but if you can be friends do so! My love told me 2 weeks after breakup that he couldn't be my friend because it was too difficult for him. He was the one who dumped me ): You will find strength in your friends and in chasing after your dreams, thats whats helping me stay afloat. I miss him so much >.<

  3. #387092012-09-12 23:21:05megumi-tan said:

    Well scars heal. Or...wait scars don't heal. Wounds do. So... scares fade. But wounds leave scars.... well what I'm trying to say is you will get over it.

  4. #387122012-09-13 00:25:54 *Mau said:

    Relationships suck, and a lot of times don't work out. They probably won't be happy together forever, same goes for you and the next person you'll wind up with. Or maybe you will. Love is a gamble, there is never a guarantee you'll win. I honestly can't tell you why he probably took you back, or why you went back to him. Maybe he was afraid of the change, maybe you don't want to let go. Maybe he was more in love with the thought of your relationship, maybe you were too, there was no communication from what your saying.

    I think you should take a break from relationships for a while, work on yourself, think about yourself, and try to make yourself happy without being in a relationship.

  5. #387202012-09-13 03:04:27Yotsuba said:

    Yeah... this is your first relationship, it rarely ever works out... and i highly doubt anyone experiences Actual love in their early teens.

  6. #387252012-09-13 06:36:53naidraug said:

    I've lived a while and seen a bit. Most of the advice people give you about getting over a relationship, and that your first relationships are some how disposable, and hurt the most when they end, that they always end blah blah blah is a load of jaded bullshit. It doesn't help you anyway it just makes you more likely to hurt someone else. Most of the time truthfully folks never really love anyone more than themselves. It is the nature of people. Teens, adults, kids, everyone. In relationships the best advice i can give you is to try your best to figure out how to sort through all of those people, and find ONE that you feel is worth it. Stick to that person. No matter what. Not in a stalker type way, let them know that you are there, be whatever they will have you as, and let things grow by continuing to be whatever they need. Eventually if you are lucky the two of you will grow together and intertwine, Most folks would see this as a huge risk, because maybe you pick wrong. Well the fact of the matter is that people change. So even if you pick a person who is worth it today there is no guarantee they will stay deserving of your love the whole way through. Mine didn't, my devoted, loving, adorable, innocent wife of 2 years (solid loving relationship 6+ years) fucked her pregnant sisters fiance, because she wasn't sure she still loved me, and to see if she could. This destroyed me, warped me in ways you can never imagine. This is a terrible thing, that only a terrible person would do. I still love her. Because I loved her anyway, she was able to come back from a terrible dark place, our relationship stands. My feelings will never be what they were, and I will always be scarred, perhaps one day I will break as well. My point is that on a long enough timeline you might as well assume everyone will turn to shit (maybe not in the same way, and maybe you aren't the one they hurt, but does that matter?). Being able to love someone enough to bear them at their worst, and to be willing to still be the one to bring them back from it, even when they hurt you, that is something special. Look truthfully all that comes from playing the field is pain, either yours or theirs. If you have someone who is truly honorable enough to try and distance themselves from you to spare you the pain of their family drama (you may not have this, it could be a lame excuse) then that is probably someone who has what it takes to BECOME worth loving. Because in the end it isn't what sort of person anyone is to start with, it is who they are willing to become with you. Just find someone who seems like a life walking beside would be a good life, and let them know that is what you intend to do. It's really no worse an idea than picking someone based looks, or how they make you feel in the moment, or anything your loins or brain or emotions or parents or friends tell you anyways.

  7. #387302012-09-13 07:04:10SENsei said:

    my devoted, loving, adorable, innocent wife of 2 years (solid loving relationship 6+ years) fucked her pregnant sisters fiance, because she wasn't sure she still loved me, and to see if she could.

    http://i.minus.com/i0ySWFWUfoPEJ.png

  8. #387432012-09-13 12:22:54 *Cloud-VK said:

    @Yotsuba

    Yeah... this is your first relationship, it rarely ever works out... and i highly doubt anyone experiences Actual love in their early teens.

    I disagree, love in my opinion is not an emotion that can be determined by age, or really anything I meen there are people that find it earlier.I think its just one of the bullets in fates clip, we dont pull the trigger and sometimes I think we cant figure out when it hits but we can determine how to react when we know we got something good.

  9. #387502012-09-13 15:56:01Yotsuba said:

    Well i don't think you can experience love at 15/16 Love is a commitment, not something that simply makes you happy. When you love, you sacrifice so much in hopes for a higher reward, a reward that can't be expressed.

    I actually can't even go into details, but if family problems of a 15/16 year old was enough to sway him out of the relationship, then it wasn't love.

  10. #387742012-09-14 00:57:38InvisibleRainbow said:

    @BboyNoblesse so I see you haven't become less of a douche..

    anyway

    but out of curiosity, not that theres a certain point in life everyone abides by but, at what age could you imagine ones mind being mature enough to actually experience love?

  11. #388002012-09-14 12:26:48Cloud-VK said:

    @Yotsuba

    Well i don't think you can experience love at 15/16 Love is a commitment, not something that simply makes you happy. When you love, you sacrifice so much in hopes for a higher reward, a reward that can't be expressed.

    What makes you think teens are so lazy. Sorry man I know its your opinion and im not going to get in a pissing contest with you. But what your saying doesnt even reigester to me.

  12. #388152012-09-14 19:22:36 *Mau said:

    I would not say teenagers are lazy with love, but love tends not to last with them because they're growing and changing quickly than others. Relationships don't last because their views and compatibly shift, they're still learning about themselves, that never changes in life, but changes are much faster when you're a teenager.

    Not to mention, most teenagers don't know what they want in a relationship, or what they need to build a lasting one. This is a generalization I know, I know there are individual teens who know how to build successful and lasting relationships, but the majority as a whole do not. Relationships are fleeting, lasting maybe months/a year if they're determined. But they drift apart most of the time, from being not ready for the commitment, going different paths in life, realizing new things about themselves that would make it impossible to continue the relationship, or just falling out of "love" (read: infatuation/crush).