"I used to have a life before The Colorless"

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  1. Need to vent a bit.

    #396052012-09-29 05:16:45 *bleachedsnow said:

    Sorry for spamming or whatever, but I needed somewhere to vent a little. Disregard if you aren't interested.

    So earlier today, my parents and I got into a fight. I was being all defiant and shit, and my dad didn't take it very well so he slapped me in the face. I've been hit before, but this is the first time that it was on the face. It hurt a bit, but I've went through more painful things without crying or anything like elbowing the corner of a table with my funny bone.

    So why am I crying then? I start crying whenever I even think about what happened. And I feel pissed because of that. I'm pissed that I'm so weak that I cry for no reason. I almost wish he hit me harder so that I have a reason for crying about it.

    Thanks for reading, I guess.

  2. #396062012-09-29 05:53:45Momimochi said:

    I was being all defiant and shit, and my dad didn't take it very well so he slapped me in the face.

    Oh hey. That happens to me ALL THE TIME. I am an ass for a child, methinks

    Except I don't cry because I got used to it.

  3. #396122012-09-29 06:21:52Sol said:

    Uh, Okay.

    This will be a nice comment, Fair warning:

    Look. Don't feel weak just because you got slapped across your face and you cry because , (and yeah, this is why you're/were crying) Your Dad was the one that slapped you for the first time. It happens. Typically, a Parent does such things for the child not to go and Revolt again. All i can say is, there's nothing "weak" about crying. i learned that the hard way.

  4. #396222012-09-29 09:47:28T-man said:


    Hmmm seems to me that you just dont like the way things went down and your confused, shocked, and feel guilty about what went down and your trying to think out if all of this is your fault or your totally in the hate sage and are thinking of how to get back at them.

  5. #396232012-09-29 09:53:32Kuin said:

    Wow, you're just as supportive as usual CL... save for OverSol of course.

    To the post though, you're not weak for crying. You'll learn that crying is something that you should never be ashamed of, and it doesn't make you any less of a person. Everybody need to cry time and again, and If you don't then there's most likely something wrong there. But just know that you weren't the weak one in that situation, your father was. For it takes a truly weak and depraved man to hit his child, someone who they should love unconditionally. So if you cry, don't cry because you thought you were weak, cry because you have a father who isn't half a man.

    Hope you feel better soon, my friend.

  6. #396272012-09-29 10:00:46T-man said:


    Upyours I was just saying what I feel in the same circumstances I never said he was weak for crying.

    So if you cry, don't cry because you thought you were weak, cry because you have a father who isn't half a man.

    and thats not exactly good advice there and your getting on us?

  7. #396342012-09-29 10:19:23 *Mau said:

    Cry because you know you did wrong, and got punished. I would say depending on how you acted and what qualifies as being defiant, you may have deserved it.

    @T-man Calm the fuck down, and why are you taking it out on Kuin? He wasn't even talking to you. Are you suffering from butthurt? Do you want some ice?

  8. #396352012-09-29 10:27:18SENsei said:

    We all need to take a lesson from Emiya Kiritsugu.

    It would be good if everything was only an assumption, but right now Emiya Kiritsugu was facing the cruel truth. Soon, he would erase Natalia by his own hands. Now, A300 had appeared at the sky at the break of dawn with sparkling silver wings.

    “… Perhaps I, have really lost it.”

    Natalia still believed without a doubt that Kiritsugu, on the other side of the radio, was in a hotel in New York, so she said leisurely with no caution.

    “Maybe I would never end up saying those things if such a big mistake didn’t occur. It seems my time is up, too. Should I be retiring…”

    “– If you retire, then what do you plan on doing after?”

    Kiritsugu still faked an even voice. Meanwhile, his two hands have started to set the missile launcher onto his shoulder, and aimed the missile at the airliner.

    “If I lose my job… haha, then I may really become your mother.” Even with his eyes running full of tears, he was still able to accurately decide the distance to the target… it was within 1500 meters. A certain hit.

    “You… really are my family.”

    Kiritsugu said softly, then he released the missile.

    In the few seconds that the missile had to be manually directed, Kiritsugu had to keep the aim on the airliner that Natalia was on and all his memories about her resurfaced in Kiritsugu’s mind.

    But that torture did not last long. Soon the missile locked onto the heat radiation the giant commercial airliner emitted out. The missile left Kiritsugu’s control, and rushed mercilessly towards the target like a hungry shark.

    The missile hit squarely on the gas tank beneath the wings; Kiritsugu watched the plane tilt and fall downwards.

    The collapse afterwards was like a sand picture blown apart by a stormy wind – the masses of iron that lost its thrust was dismembered like rotten wood, and became a cloud of fine dust that silently fell onto the surface of the sea. The carcass of the plane that fell in the rising morning glow danced like confetti at a gala.

    The first sliver of the dawn’s light that shone out from the other side of the horizon didn’t touch Natalia’s face even at the end. Basked in the morning sun all alone, Emiya Kiritsugu started crying soundlessly.

    Once again, he had saved a crowd of unknown faces. Without anyone knowing.

  9. #396482012-09-29 15:46:47momo said:

    They crying, it happens. You didn't cry because of the pain, but the shock of getting slapped so suddenly. Can't say whether it makes you a wuss or not.

    Instead of questioning why you cried, why not question why you were slapped? Maybe question why you were being such a brat to your parents, bro.

  10. #396542012-09-29 17:15:11bleachedsnow said:

    Thanks for the responses.

    After thinking on it for a while, I guess I deserved a slap after all that happened. I just didn't expect it to be on the face. At least I wasn't bawling. That would have been embarrassing for someone my age.

    For defiant, I was popping those green baggies that come in big packages in the aftermath of the fight. I would say bubble wrap, but it was a lot bigger than that. So it was pretty loud. And eventually, my dad told me to stop. I was in a pretty bad mood, so I kept popping them. And you know what happened from there.

    But now I tense up every time my dad is in the same room, and I can't even make eye contact with him anymore. I guess the teenage rebellious streak isn't gonna show up any time soon.