"Believe me, if I started murdering people, there'd be none of you left" - Charles Manson
Shovel from Hell badge by @OneDollar
Twice moderator, twice retired, five times permanently banned. All posts before 17.11.2012 were deleted by previous administration. Wielder of the Blood-Stained Shovel and the local sick evil fuck. Owner of the CL News, oldfag, terrorist, slayer of admins, veteran lurker and the person who gets things done no matter how many people would die in the process. Approach at your own risk.
Kirn joined on May 4th, 2010, since that has made 1478 posts that are still accessible today, 62 of which are threads. Helping shape the community, Kirn has given 1835 upvotes, and was last online on Oct 6th, 2015.
@DarkChaplain well, I don't know about incentive, didn't think about that. But I think they worked well. I was kinda afraid of your story, knowing how big it is, but it was easy to read. And I guess chapters contributed to that.
@DarkChaplain yeah, figured there was a lot..
Oh, one thing I forgot to mention also. You are the only one who had the whole thing separated into chapters, and I think it also made for more comfortable read. Clear switch between scenes, I'd say. I think I tried to do chapters in some of my writing some years ago, but personally, I never could manage to make them really work.
Alrighty, I am now done, so I shall commence the bashing of the authors. I will say, though, that this time around the average quality is higher than usual and definitely higher than I personally expected. Oh, and I will talk a bit about me own story at the end. So, let's get to it! Oh, and yes, I will probably have spoilers here, so ye be warned.
@Dark-B - "Bravery's Dim Light"
my big disappointment for this one was that I kinda expected a sort of investigation, but after initial conversations all we have is either violence of exposition. Mention of the parliament made chuckle, because I kinda remembered the Sherlock Holmes (2009) movie with a similar thing in its plot. I have to say that the writing itself is not really good at all, there are things that are alright on chat, but do not work well in proper writing, like writing words with ALL BIG LETTERS. Well, I guess you are improving with your english writing style, but you have a really long way ahead of you.
@DarkChaplain - "The Ashbourne Revelation"
You know, I did read me some Lovecraft back in the day, and I know well about the concept of the investigators in Lovecraft universe. But this is my first time actually reading something of that particular genre/setting combination. Very nicely written, though not heavy on the crime part, I think... I guess, mostly because there's not much of an investigation, and the whole thing feels more like an event. Also, I do know that you had to cut it somewhat, and when epilogue started, I kinda had to re-read the end part of the last chapter to really get that it is actually over and how it all played out. I'd say, this is one of the top three stories of the book.
@Frey - "Heist!"
So, one advice for writing your first story - do not make it long. If you write for the first time, you are likely to not write well, and extending the story is just making readers suffer needlessly. For me, this was the hardest story to read and to get into. Feels like you have no idea what style you wanted to have there - you start at a plans/mystery stage, then go into fast-paced heist scene (heist scenes are hard to write because they do require planning and good descriptions, which is really not the case here), and in the end you just forfeit it all and go for full unrealistic action with bullets and knives flying around. Needlessly long, inconsistent writing, and bad writing form too. I barely got through the damned thing. And what is it with more and more CAPSED WORDS towards the end? It felt like you were having a fit. I believe this is the single worst story of the book.
@hellstorm901 - "The Usual Suspects"
First of all - really? You rip off that name?.. Still, the story was alright. Decent writing, though it needs a bit of polishing up in a few places, a simple enough, but proper crime setting with investigation and all. Justified setting with augmentations and protesters. And I did appreciate the fact that the story wasn't longer than it had to be. I do wonder about the ending, because it kinda makes the reader to overthink things, both about the story and about the crime scenes. Still, a decent story that one.
@--Jack-- - "Just a Matter of Time"
I have to say, this is probably the story that is the least about crime among all that we have here. There is crime, but really, it's just there as a background. Also, time-traveling is kind of an evil thing to touch for a writer, though you did a fine job making up a person imposing on a new timeline. The writing itself is very good though, and you made good work of making exposition interesting enough, which is really not an easy thing to do in a time-travelling setting. Well, in the end I do, like with many other stories like this, have to ask a question of 'how the hell did this loop started in the first place, really?', but still, it was nicely done, so it is also one of the three best stories in the book.
@johan_5179 - "Decent Folk"
And this one is probably the one that is the most about crime. Good writing, well-thought out story. This one was also somewhat hard to follow, but not because of the flaws, but because it was better thought out than I expected to read. Interesting take on things, with not much violence, but some very nice graphic images there. I also liked that the story is pretty much understandable - you see what is happening and you don't have to think about what it all means, like it was the case in some of your previous stories. Well, you did have a character who is a walking conscience there still, overthinking things at the end for us, but he doesn't interrupt the good parts, so it's all well. This is also one of the three best stories here.
@Maudia - "A Tall Tale for a Bad Time"
I guess, this is an interesting idea in its own right - trying to show cause and effect. However, there are problems. And if I would just brush off the improbability of the premise - after all, we are writing fiction here, so there is a place for exaggerations - I can't really ignore the writing itself. Style is not good at all, and the most often offence here is that you constantly switch between past and present time in your sentences. Which really makes it a pain to read. And I couldn't really get into the structure of the story. At first you give us a fiction within fiction, then the middle part is just exposition, and then it turns out that the guy was actually telling all this exposition to people who are understandably bored after hearing all that. And in the end you just try to forcibly rub the reader's face into the moral of the story which feels like something between fanfics are evil and fanfics don't really matter.
@Rinneko - "Peccatomania"
The more psychological one, that is. This one was also somewhat hard to read, in part because of the style that, like Hell's, does need some polishing at times, and in part because of the whole mind-games style of the story. Again, the exaggeration here is the idea that kindergarten kids would do such stuff... and I don't mean the act itself - kids are evil, we all know that - but the planning behind it. I did like the obsession theme, and how it was not real, but actually still real. Character grasping at the fact that she is actually sick and twisted - nice touch that was. Also, this kinda reminded me of my own story that I did for the horror anthology.
Well, that's that. We have three prime stories in the book, some that are alright, and some that are not good at all. As I said, I expected it to be worse. And I really feared that, with as many words as some stories here have, it would be a painful read, which was not the case. Well, except Frey's story. I guess, all that is left is for me to poke at my own.
@Kirn - "Slow Night"
I guess, most people already noticed that I went for a classy setting of some mid-30ies here. And there's really not that much crime going on. Well, yes, there's a bank job, there's a high-ranking member of the mafia doing his business, but it's mostly a background. I have to say, before I sat down to write this, I only knew I want it to be 30ies and my inspiration was the Nighthawks painting by Edward Hopper. So, I sat down and I just started writing, and it took me just 4 hours to finish it all, so really, there's not much effort put into this. I am somewhat happy with how it turned out though, because I managed to keep to my usual writing style even if the genre is something unfamiliar to me. In the end, I guess the strong point of the story is also its weak point. It's a light reading. It's easy enough to read, but at the same time it's not meaningful or really substantial, and there's no moral of any kind or even a message. Oh well.
We already have a thread for this crap of an anime. Making another thread for this thing is redundant and a bad form. Use the goddamn search next time before making a thread.
So, we are now have Poroshenko 'peace plan' in effect. God help us all.
For those who didn't follow the news on that particular issue: Poroshenko announced he has a plan to bring Ukraine back to peace, and he has been working on that thing for these past days. he already made good press, meeting with representatives from Lugansk and Donetsk regions and discussing the plan with them.
Which is a lie. He met not with any representative of the opposing force, but with some of the rich and influential people from those regions who support his cause, because that is exactly the kind of people he puts in power now, as he did in Dnepropetrovsk region. The whole purpose of the meeting was to show that there is a dialogue between two sides of this war, while there is none.
So, having 'discussed' the plan, Poroshenko announced what it is. And it literally goes like that: he would declare a ceasefire, that would last for a short time. During that time, separatists must lay down all weapons and Russian mercenaries must leave the country.
That's it. The whole 'peace plan'. Which pretty much says 'surrender or fuck off', and you may notice how there's nothing there about negotiations with anyone. And obviously, UN is all for the plan, while Russia is here to point out the many and obvious flaws which noone seems to notice.
And, and here's the fun part. Ceasefire was declared yesterday evening (and should last for something like 7 days, I think). And one hour after that another city was attacked by artillery fire. This is so stupid it's not even funny anymore.
Another thing - pretty minor one - I want to mention is the pattern of the news. Since I pretty much have a few news tabs open 24/7 now, I do notice some funny stuff. And while there are some obvious things like everything bad being blamed on Russian terrorists after 12 hours, some things you can notice if you go through the news during many days.
I already said that there were reports of Ukrainian military bringing BM-21 Grad into the war. Now, as I mentioned briefly in my previous post, after some time we had news with videos of destruction in cities, which said that this is the result of BM-21 Grad artillery fire... but those Grads were used by, obviously, separatists.
Already a fair amount of bullshit, looking like Ukraine military wanting to cover up the destruction they caused in cities and among civilians.
But it didn't end there, because BM-21 Grads appeared in another news report. This time it was information about a whole column of Russian war vehicles - at least 10 of BM-21 Grads in particular - moving from Russia to Ukraine and joining the fight.
And as if that wasn't enough, that article also added that Ukraine army fought with those vehicles and managed to capture one, where they immediately discovered proof of it belonging to Russia army. Obviously, no proof is shown.
And, reading that, I am left to wonder. Grads are brought into the war. Then news make it believe that Grads are in the hands of separatists, but that is easy - this is a cover for destruction, I can get that. But then Grads are used as some 'evidence' that Russia is sending army vehicles here. And I wonder, are Grads used just because they were used before in the news, and is there an actual reason? The most interesting theory I can imagine is that by now some of the Ukrainian Grads are actually in hands of other people or just plain lost (hey, a week ago our army idiots managed to lose Ukrainian APC in a swamp... in Russia, no less!), so now those Grads can actually be used against the military, and they are already making a story to explain that it's Russians attacking them.
But really, thinking about how much of what we get now is bullshit, and how much isn't... this is just not healthy.
The war is still going strong, by the way. We keep getting news about separatists being under supplied and tired and almost broken, and next thing we get is reports about them capturing another base or destroying more vehicles. It's all very uncertain.
One certain thing is that working people of eastern regions are fed up with the state of affairs. And east regions are big on mining stuff, you know, and some days ago we had a big protest organized by miners, demanding Ukrainian government to stop the war. And they threatened that if the war won't stop, then they will also take up arms and join the rebellion.
Last and a bit of a personal note. Tomorrow - June 22th - is a date when Nazi Germany attacked USSR. Obviously, in these hard times, this date is more important than in previous years. And already pretty much every activist organization declared that they will march on the streets of my city on that day. Everyone, from right sector people, to survivors of Kulikovo square.
Now, our city administration declared that every and all public demonstrations during that day will be prohibited. However, obviously, everyone knows that most likely noone would listen. And we expect a lot of trouble during that day. From fights to terrorist acts. And everyone is advised to even not go outside during that day.
And here's the personal part. About ten days ago I bought a ticket to the theatre to see the play. And that play will be tomorrow.
And even more fun - the theatre I will visit is called "Russian Drama Theatre".
And it's located near Sobornaya square, which is pretty much where most fights took place during Odessa 2nd of May events.
I just hope I can get my money back if the theatre would get bombed while I would be in it.
Finally started reading. Not counting my own story, there are 8 of them there, and I am now done with the first half. Have to say, already this looks like a very interesting batch.
Delusional gender-confused bastard from India.
The Blackwell Bundle -75%
3$ for 4 quest games of prime quality. Too bad it doesn't include the last one, but anyways. If you are one of those people who buys games - there's not reason for you not to pick this up.
@Ecstasy you are mine, so I can allow myself to spoil you a bit.