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99th percentile

"Believe me, if I started murdering people, there'd be none of you left" - Charles Manson


http://i.imgur.com/ynAUWpp.jpg Shovel from Hell badge by @OneDollar

Twice moderator, twice retired, five times permanently banned. All posts before 17.11.2012 were deleted by previous administration. Wielder of the Blood-Stained Shovel and the local sick evil fuck. Owner of the CL News, oldfag, terrorist, slayer of admins, veteran lurker and the person who gets things done no matter how many people would die in the process. Approach at your own risk.


Art by @Shirosuke http://i.imgur.com/yEKdCMy.jpg Art by @TeruShinozaki http://i.imgur.com/YVwhHfV.jpg Art by @Izukio & @Kiboune http://i.imgur.com/xkZhBPQ.png Art by @Ecstasy http://i.imgur.com/8Ai6JGR.png Art by @Lieutenant http://i.imgur.com/N2TEW71.jpg


Kirn joined on May 4th, 2010, since that has made 2175 posts that are still accessible today, 78 of which are threads. Helping shape the community, Kirn has given 2548 upvotes, and was last online on Aug 17th, 2017.

  • In Programming with Neko-Chan: Index

    Hmm... I wonder how useful this will be, since people here who know coding stuffs already know them coding stuffs, and the rest of them probably won't be interested anyways (also, they can't read). Still, this may be useful topic, certainly not without benefit, so good luck on this. Maybe you can even get this thread into our index, if you will get enough thematic threads going.

    Also, I think you should fit design patterns there somewhere, too. It's useful shit, that works for a whole lot of languages, and which gets neglected by too many bastards out there.

  • In Weird World News

    ‘Guardians of the Galaxy’ team up with NASA: Groot, Rocket Raccoon on mission patch


    The scientists at NASA enjoy Marvel’s characters so much that two of its most popular space cadets will now appear on an official patch: Groot and Rocket Raccoon.

    The Center for the Advancement of Science in Space (CASIS), and Marvel’s Custom Solutions teamed up for a project that will symbolize all payloads that are going to the national laboratory on the International Space Station (ISS).

    Now, this is something I completely approve of.

    “It’s exciting for us because this is hopefully the beginning of something that goes beyond just the mission patch. A little bit later this year we hope to unveil an upcoming STEM [Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics], initiative that is going to be focused on these particular characters,” Patrick O’Neill, Marketing and communications manager, said.

    You know, when you think about space exploration, while you know that those people are human also, you always imagine everything to be very strict and no-nonsense. So, suddenly finding out they take these characters for patches logo... it's damn weird. But in a damn good way.

  • In How many tourists will Ukraine get this year?

    Time for some more news...

    That is, I have to say - we do not have a lot in terms of news now. Things go as they go, we just slip further down, while eyes of the world are looking at terrorist attacks all over planet. Oh, btw, naturally, our politicians blame every loud terroristic attack on Russia. Governor of my region said literally this: "Rebels and Russia will be sorry for coup attempt in Turkey". Yeah... fun fact is, Turkey now seems to go against USA course, while I am sure that some politicians here don't understand that yet, and still support it, because they want to show that they are loyal to USA. Dumb fucks...

    Well, anyways. Things are bad. Exchange rate is going up again, 1 dollar here gives you 24.50 hrivnas, and in some banks it's as high as 24.70 even. We are still got no solution about who will we get gas from, meaning we lost another month of preparing for winter season. Economy is still shite. People are still protesting in Kiev against communal payments raise. Artillery and attacks on the east are increasing every day, closing to the scale of how it was right at the beginning - every day there are some numbers of people killed, often on both sides.

    Things are pretty calm, in terms of this country, yep. Still, I guess some things did happen.

    I guess, most curious developments still surround our "holy politician hero" Savchenko. Thing is, she still keeps us saying things that go completely against what is the country's current rhetoric. As I wrote, she keeps insisting on direct negotiations with Novorossia. Recently, she even said that not only we must stop the war, but both sides will have to apologize to each other for deaths. Which is something we can't really say here, because we must maintain the opinion that ALL of Novorossia are ruthless terrorists. I mean, really, currently, it's a common idea, that our government wants to take those regions back, but without any people - that's why they strike so much against places where civilians live.
    And now our "national hero" comes out ans says stuff like that. Now, some people are already petitioning president to take the "hero of Ukraine" title from her. Don't know if he will. But I am really interested now about who makes Savchenko talk like that. This is a behavior that is in complete opposition to how she acted during her trial in Russia. And we all know that she herself is not at all smart to have any serious political play going. So... is she really controlled from Russia now, as yell those who want to remove her? Is she going by some script prepared by Timoshenko? I can't say, but this is actually one interesting thing that is going in our government.

    Oh, and it IS the only interesting thing going, because our government is taking a break. So, really, all parliament stopped working few days ago and went for a summer vacation, 'till 1st September, I imagine. Yeah, like "yep, things are going well, we are off to relax, fuck you all, see you in a month or so". This also ties up with 100 days since Volodymyr Groysman became our new PM, so we can get some results of his work:

    Pretty much, most notable thing our government did is increased communal payments for population. By 90% or so. That's not even news, we all knew it would happen - this is why there are protests in Kiev now. This is tied to gas prices increase, while we don't even pay for the gas anyways...

    Next. Negotiations with IMF (International Monetary Fund). Totally botched - they don't want to give us more money, because of huge corruption, visible with naked eye. They gave us demands that we had to do as a country, but we totally failed those (mostly, at least), so this year we were promised some money 3 times already, and all the time schedule for that was postponed. Meaning, this government can't get us any money, to try and pick up this country. Mostly because everyone knows that money would just be stolen.

    Another fuckup, for which I am kinda grateful. Port in my city is still unsold. Auction was botched by the current government, mostly because half of our politicians want to get it for themselves. So, while this scrap is going, port is still kinda unsold... Which is more or less good, cause I am sure that it would be sold - it won't be sold to people I would have preferred to have here in my city. Not that anyone asks me, but still.

    We also had some scandals in the government with bribes, taxes and frauds... but that's kinda normal.

    And finally, few weeks ago Groysman personally said that "in 3-5 years we can make Ukraine international gas provider". Which is very much facepalm-worthy, as we can't even mine our coal now, which we know we have.

    And after that - they are off to rest. Leaving country to steam a bit, I imagine...

    So that's what we do - we steam and simmer just bellow the boiling point. Conditions get worse, people finally get on the streets by their own will, confused and poorly organized, war claims claims more and more attention...

    I think, by the time our parliament returns to work, things will get nicely fucked up.

  • In 【CL Chorus: Mixing stage】BRAVE SHINE 【EDIT TO ROSTER】

    @Momimochi stop playing fucking pokemons and update the thread.

  • In How do you define "maturity"?

    When I hear term "mature", I think about wine.

    That is all.

  • In Weird World News

    Again, credit to @Lieutenant for finding this.

    Meet The Man Hired To Have Sex With Children


    In some remote southern regions of Malawi, it’s traditional for girls to be made to sleep with a paid sex worker known as a ‘hyena’ once they reach puberty – a title given to a man to provide what is called sexual ‘cleansing’, the BBC reports.

    If a wife loses her husband, tradition says that she must be sexually cleansed before she can bury him. If she has an abortion, it is again required that she must sleep with a hyena.

    Okay? Okay. If you are young girl there, your own fucking family will hire a fucker (literally) to ravage your little body. For days.

    For teenage girls who have finished their first menstruation, they are made to have sex over a three-day period. It marks their transition into womanhood.

    If a girl refuses, it is believed that disease or fatal misfortune could fall upon their family or the entire village.

    Talk about fucking peer pressure! Oh, and here's something to top it all off:

    But the tradition has a darker twist than just the sexual aspect. The ritual ‘cleansing’ can have the opposite affect – Aniva is HIV-positive.

    This is why we have fucking flamethrowers, people. Let's use them.

  • In Movies based on true stories.

    Elvis and Nixon (2016)

    This movie is about pretty much one day - when Elvis met with Nixon, and they took a picture, and apparently, everybody was very happy about it. This happened before complete recording of such things became mandatory, so details of the meeting are kinda still semi-secret. Making this a fiction about a true, but quite vague historical event.
    So, apparently, it is true. The King - Elvis Presley himself - one day just went to Nixon, asking for a federal badge. Weird, right? I myself had no idea that even happened. I mean, just thinking that Elvis - being most famous entertainer of USA - and Nixon - being most famous stuck-up asshole of USA - actually met and agreed on something and had a picture. Holy hell...
    How true? Well, noone can say for sure. Except for Jerry Schilling, who is represented in the movie, and who is alive and was participating in the production. Here is article about his account of the events. So, movie is a comedy, and it does what it does to poke fun at things, to entertain us. However, some similarities, while not true to the event itself, can be quite true to life. Also, check out that last part about why Elvis even wanted the badge. Nice, eh? Very practical.


    But there's more. Here's the article about a guy called Egil 'Bud' Krogh, who worked on this thing from other side - he was part of Nixon's staff at the time. So, if you want to get a more point-by-point account of the events, this is the article you wanna read.

    All in all - if not for this movie, I would never knew about the event. Goddamn incredible, really.

  • In Pet pictures!

    Yeah, I am all for olde traditions )

  • In Pokemon GO [Buddy System: Soon™]

    The CIA’s ‘Pokémon Go’ App is Doing What the Patriot Act Can’t


    So, from what I red about the game, when you start it up - usually in the safety of your own home - there's like 3 starter Pokemon spawn very near you. You know, to get you started. And you need to take pictures of them from different angles. And you do.

    Congratulations, you just made pictures of inside of your house for those nice people who wanted you to do it for ages but had no idea how to make you.

  • In Which Games Are You Currently Playing?


    This game is a very curious one. It's a combination of 3D action game and a top-down shooter. Hmmm... no, that doesn't sound right. Let me think.... This game feels like a a child of an angry rape between bullet hell game mechanics and quick time event game mechanics. And it was a mutual rape, like, both sides fucked each other long and hard, and in the end noone could figure who ended up on top, and some time later they had a cute little bloodthirsty baby, that is this game.

    You think I over-exaggerate?..

    Well, I really don't. You see, this game is... very short, actually. If you do everything perfectly, you probably finish it within an hour, watching all cutscenes. Thing is, you will not do everything perfectly, because this game is hell. It has nothing except for boss fights, and it's deliberately difficult.


    Story is both simple and hard at the same time. You are a prisoner in something that seems to be an extremely elaborate prison. One day you are released by a mysterious bunny person (no, I am not on drugs), and told to escape, to kill every jailer and go back to the world. So you do. And... that's pretty much what you get for all the game. All information you get is from the words of your jailers before/during/after fights, and also from the comments of the teleporting, gravity-defying mysterious bunny person (no, I am not on drugs, really).
    Game actually doesn't even tell you your name until the final part, and you don't get the names of the bosses you killed till you see the credits. Final part, though, makes up for all the lack of information, making a pretty clear explanation of what's going on. Also, there are basically 3 endings - mid-game ending, and also bad and good endings at the final stage.


    But what you will care more for is the bosses. The gameplay. They are one and the same. You only get a bit of a backstory to every boss, but that will help you get a feel for them. And trust me, you will spend enough time with them, while they be kicking your ass, to start really caring for them.
    Now, gameplay is generally similar in all fights (with some exceptions). You start in the big arena, fighting against the boss. You can shoot at it, or try to close distance and attack with sword. They will also try to shoot or melee you. Shooting attacks you either dodge or shoot down, and melee attacks you have to parry, which requires quite good reaction. After you damage boss enough in that stage, you go into more of a melee fight, where you can't shoot, and arena is much smaller. There you work hard on staying alive and damaging your opponent, until it loses a "life". After which you go again, because every boss has a few lives, and each of those changes their mechanics to some extent. Meaning, after you feel comfortable in first boss stage, you will probably get raped in the second.
    Last stage of the boss is usually a pure bullet hell, which you have to survive to land the final slash.


    Between the fights, you just walk from one boss to the other, listening to your bunny friend. And... that's pretty much the whole game. Which doesn't sound like much, but this game is a lot, trust me. Cutscenes are beautiful, landscapes are bizarre, and bosses are both extremely hard and extremely memorable. If you want a brutal sword-wielding challenge, concentrated to the max - this is for you.

    Oh, and I am writing all that after beating the game in normal more. I don't even want to think about what will happen if I decide to try it on actual hard.